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Love in the Time of Online Auctions: the Sequel
Sasha Blaze
When I got up this morning, I found this forlorn creature on the front step:

ME: I won't even ask how you reached the lock. Jeez, it's as bad as having a cat. . . . So what are you looking at, Atsu-kun?

ATSUMORI: The rain on these leaves.

ATSUMORI: I remembered a poem. tsuma nashi to . . . yanushi ya kureshi . . . ominaeshi

ME: Translation, please?

ATSUMORI: I have no wife, I said.
And so my landlord gave me
A little maiden-flower.

ME: Ah. Also, ouch.

ATSUMORI: Sumimasen. I did not mean offense.

ME: I know you didn't. . . . Atsu-kun, why don't you sit down for a minute? Please?

ATSUMORI: Sit? Here? Yes, if you wish.

ME: I thought you might have been online this morning, to check the results of that auction.

ATSUMORI: Iie. Pen-san was right. It was nothing more than a night's dream.

ME: No, it wasn't, sweetie. You won. She's coming to live with us. My financial planner is going to have a cow, but what's done is done.

ATSUMORI: Tsuma . . . tsuma desu ka? Hai?

ME: Well, I don't know that "wife" is necessarily--

ATSUMORI: Tsuma desu. Watashi no tsuma desu. Wai, watashi . . . Will you send my picture to her, please, Cynthia-san? Please? She should see me before she comes. She may not think that I am worthy of her. Has the go-between spoken to her family? She must come from a high-born family. I do not--

ME: Breathe, Atsu-kun. This really isn't exactly a marriage arrangement, and--

ATSUMORI: I will stand here. Please take my picture and send it to her. Should I change my clothing? You will tell her family that I have fine clothes, hai? I will not shame her.

ME: And I'll point out that you're capable of combing your hair, too. Though sometimes I wonder about that one. . . . Okay, there you go. Picture taken. Are you happy now?

ATSUMORI: Domo arigato gozaimashita. I am not . . . I do not have the words to say what I mean. I will work my whole life to be worthy of this great gift.

ME: Just promise me that you'll stay off the computer when I'm not at home, okay? Promise?

ATSUMORI: The rain is beautiful, ne?

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Eeeehehehehe, he's so cute. X3 I can't wait to see what *actually* happens when they meet...she looks like she might be a bit of a firecracker. ^_^

A lot will depend on her--what her personality seems to be like when she gets here. (You know how that weird dynamic goes!) The rest of the pack, of course, are assuming that she's hot stuff and ready for anything. But I kinda think Atsumori has a point, despite his romantic cluelessness . . . she also looks a little sad and a little lonely in the auction pictures. Ve shall seeeeeeee.

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